A video that is making rounds on social media, shared by stand-up comedian Hasan Minhaj is a conversation between him and behavioral change expert Mel Robbins. The two dove deep into something that many families may also deal with but do not ever say : hoarding. What started as a funny story about Minhaj's mother holding onto old VHS tapes turned into an emotional discussion about memory, loss, and the human need for control. Minhaj said that his mom still has "VHS cassette tapes stacked up in the guest room", including the 1996 movie Dunston Checks In, which he loved as a child. "We don't even have a VHS player. My children won't watch VHS, I loved that movie in 1996, but I am 39 now, we gotta move on."However, he shares that when he tried to throw it away, it led to what he described as "nuclear war". Robbins immediately pointed out why: "She has transferred her own emotional attachment to physical objects. It is not a cassette tape, it represents something else."Robbins explained that hoarding often is not about the objects themselves, but the about being emotionally stuck on it. She noted that "there's a very close connection between depression, OCD, and hoarding. You're dealing with a mental issue that manifests in things." This is why clutter becomes a coping mechanism, this is a way to stay in control, when other areas of life feel uncertain. When Minhaj mentioned that his mom keeps even outdated software like Windows XP CDs, she said that the reason she is holding on to all these is because he does not call her enough. "If you do not call enough, the things remind her of you... it might remind her of a time when you lived at home, when you were younger. If she holds on to it, she stays in control."Robbins also told Minhaj, that the habit of his mother hoarding "is not driving her crazy", but it is driving him "crazy". Why Someone May HoardAs per the NHS UK, the reason why someone begins hoarding could be a symptom for another condition. It could be well associated with severe depression, psychotic disorders, such as schizophrenia, or obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). As per a 2015 study published in the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry, hoarding behaviors occur in a variety of neuropsychiatric disorders, including OCD, schizophrenia and dementia. The act of hoarding is defined as a pattern of persistent difficulties with discarding personal possessions, even those with no clear value. In Minhaj's mother case, it is the VHS cassettes, and software CDs.Who Is At Risk?As per Harvard Health, it affects approximately 2 to 6% of the adult population, across genders. However, hoarding is more common in an individual who live alone. Hoarding also occurs three times as often in older adults as in the general population. What Can Be Done? View this post on Instagram A post shared by Hasan Minhaj Doesn't Know (@hmdk)]]>Cognitive behavioral therapy or CBT is an option that can be considered. It focuses on addressing cognitive distortions related to fear of discarding and urges to acquire, while the behavioral component focuses on sorting through and discarding materials in a systematic and structured way.
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