Manipulation, according to the American Psychological Association, is behavior designed to exploit, control or otherwise influence others to one’s advantage. Some people Some people do this with words; others through actions. In a new study, researchers found that there is another act that manipulators often use to their advantage. We think of a hug or a hand on the arm as comforting and connecting. But a new study suggests that these simple actions can hide a darker intention. Research in the journal Current Psychology reveals that people who are manipulative and self-centered (narcissistic) often use touch to calculate how to influence or control their romantic partners. Senior researcher Richard Mattson points out that in these relationships, you not only miss out on the good feelings that touch usually brings like lower stress and a boost of the "love hormone" oxytocin, but the touch is actively used to benefit the manipulative person, often hurting their partner in the process. This work connects how someone touches with who they are. How Do Narcissists Manipulate With Touch? Most studies look at the positive effects of touch, but this research focused on the opposite: when touch is used to harm or trick someone. The study centered on people who showed traits belonging to the "Dark Triad," which is a group of three linked, negative personality traits:Narcissism: Being extremely self-focused, needing admiration, and lacking empathy for others.Psychopathy: Having very little empathy (inability to understand others' feelings) and acting impulsively.Machiavellianism: Being cunning and manipulative to reach personal goals, often deceiving others. The researchers surveyed over 500 college students about their comfort with touch and how they used it in relationships. They found that people with high levels of these dark traits were significantly more likely to use touch as a tool to control, influence, or manipulate their romantic partner, proving it wasn't about affection but about power. Does Gender Affect How Manipulators Act? The study revealed some interesting gender-based difference in how these manipulative traits showed up: Men with these darker traits tended to use touch in an effort to feel more connected to their partner. This was especially true if they already felt insecure or unstable in the relationship, using touch as a way to reinforce their bond or ease their own anxiety. Women with "Dark Triad" traits often reported feeling uncomfortable when they were touched by others. However, they were still more likely than others to use touch themselves as a means of controlling or influencing their partner. Experts summarized the core attitude of these personality types as "me first, you second." This self-serving belief is so strong that it affects even how they handle affection and physical closeness—an important part of any relationship. Can Recognizing Signs Help Build Better Relations? People with high "Dark Triad" traits often have romantic relationships that are short-lived, troubled, and complex. The study's findings offer a path toward solutions. Since touch is a powerful, low-cost tool for providing support and promoting better health, Mattson suggests this information can help create new interventions. The goal is to "leverage touch" to teach people, especially those who avoid touch or use it to manipulate, how to use it in healthy, caring, and mutual ways. Instead of using touch for control or self-protection, they could learn to use it to truly connect and support someone else.
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