Just imagine having parents who expect nothing less than perfect; everything in your test must score above 90, all actions require confirmation, and anything below their standards gets you a scolding or disappointment. Or on the flip side, imagine having absolutely no rules in place; you're free to make choices without any direction. Would either of these conditions help provide confidence and healthy self-esteem?

I can talk to some of them and relate real-life experiences about childhood and how very strict parents might affect a person's self-esteem.

"I Grew Up Following Rules, but Was I Ever Really Free?"

Sarah (name changed) is a 28-year-old software engineer who shares some childhood experience growing up with strict parents. "My parents were really strict. I had to follow their rules no matter what, and if I didn't, I'd get scolded. My whole life was all about academics. I didn't have many friends because I was too focused on school, and they got angry if my grades were anything less than 90."

Sarah's is one of those classic cases for children raised by high-expectation parents. Where structure and rules are found, the emotional aspect is usually missing which would breed chaos. "I grew up as someone who would ask them to get permission for everything. Whenever school was unbearable or if I was not getting along with other kids, they never comforted me with anything like, 'It's going to be all right.' I felt alone and scared of making my own decisions."

Like Sarah, most children of demanding parents cannot make independent decisions. The fear of mistakes and subsequently the disapprobation can weaken their self-confidence. According to Sarah, "Interviewing others with strict parents, they told me they experienced the same thing growing up feeling like they didn't know how to make decisions or how to interact socially."

Are Strict Parents Always the Culprits of Low Self-Esteem?

The connection between strict parenting and self-esteem is much more complex than it would seem at first glance. While, on one hand, children like Sarah often find themselves struggling with low self-esteem due to obedience and achievement without emotional support, on the other hand, not everyone believes it is strictly the strictness that creates a problem, but rather the character of the rules and the emotional context in which they are enforced.

The case is that of Sebin (name changed), a 33-year-old entrepreneur from Kerala brought up in a house with equally severe parents. While his parents had high expectations, much like Sarah, he did not feel crushed under parental expectations: "My parents were strict but not controlling over every move. They believed in discipline, but also encouraged me to grow on multiple parameters.". It was not just a matter of good grades; they always stretched my capabilities in other types of areas, such as sports and music.

"There were moments where I didn't meet their expectations, and sure, it was tough, but I knew they pushed me because they believed I could meet those goals. That made a huge difference. It didn't crush my confidence; it built it." Kevin reports that the high expectations from his parents were translated as respect by him. As they believed in his ability to do well, this became the basis for higher self-esteem in him.

Importance of Fairness and Balance in Parenting

What makes the experiences of Sarah and Kevin different? The difference lies in the rationality of the rules set by parents. But perhaps it is in the emotional climate fostered by parents. Sebin's parents had rather big expectations but clearly communicated the message that they were all for him. It was a situation where he was allowed to roam about in the different circles of life and experience his mistakes, giving him competence and personal agency, he says.

On the contrary, with choking strictness or arbitrariness-in this case, likened to the rules imposed by Sarah on the child-victims-children get entrapped and bottled up instead of getting guided. Strangely, strictness per se does not suffice in building self-esteem but depends on whether the rules imposed are fair and just. Actually, it is in fact when children feel that support would come to meet expectations that they develop the confidence to succeed for themselves.

Criticism vs. Strictness: A Thin Line

Low self-esteem can also emerge from a critical environment rather than strictness itself. Take, for instance, Jia, a 40-year-old marketing manager who is a mother herself from Hyderabad. "My parents were not only strict; they were overly critical. It was not just about rules; they were negative about everything I did. I loved horses, but my mom would constantly ask, 'Why do you even like horses? ' in an offended voice.

Though they paid for me to take riding lessons, they never once came to watch, nor did they ever try to encourage me."

For Jia, it wasn't the rules per se it was the failure to give emotional support and encouragement. "It was not the discipline that damaged my self-esteem. It was their ceaseless criticism, as if everything I was doing would never be good enough for them."

Although many such tyrannized children grow up successful, this is only possible under such a strict regime of rules and emotional validation. In this respect, Jia's case illustrates that the problem with rules isn't that one must have them; it is the way in which those rules are delivered and the extent to which a child's interests and abilities are validated by their caregivers.

That is the ideal kind of parenting: balance. While rules and expectations will teach discipline, emotional support is necessary to boost a child's confidence, knowing that their parents believe in them able to get things done, even when they fall short. This is the reason two-parent households or involved caregivers can make all the difference-each parent might bring their own strong qualities to the table, creating the perfectly balanced environment.

Strict parenting has no direct relation with low self-esteem. Instead, the degree of imposing limits and offering emotional support creates that confident image for the child. Be your parents strict or lenient, what matters most is whether they showed you they believed in your potential.

Some call it a miracle, and some call it a lack of choice. A baby is born in Georgia from a woman who was declared brain dead and was put on life support. She is 31-year-old Adriana Smith, who was about six months into her pregnancy.

Her mother April Newkirk told WXIA-TV that her daughter had intense headaches more then four months ago and went to Atlanta's Northside Hospital. There, she received medication and was released. However, next morning, her partner woke to her gasping, and called the emergency number 911.

Emory University Hospital determined she had blood clots in her brain and was declared brain dead, at that time she was eight weeks pregnant. She was kept on life support ever since, and the baby was born through an emergency cesarean section on Friday.

The baby is named Chance, and weighs about 1 pound and 13 ounces, and is born prematurely in six months. The baby is currently in the neonatal intensive care unit.

Miracle Or A Lack Of Choice?

While many may see it as a miracle, however, many have questioned the choice and agency of a woman and her right to live with dignity.

Her mother said that Smith was kept on life support due to Georgia's anti-abortion law. This has sparked questions about ethics and the case had exploded into a national and international news. Her mother also confirmed that the fetus had been growing while she was put on life support.

"WE did not have a choice or say about it. We want the baby. That's a part of my daughter. But the decision should have been left to us, not the state," told Newkirk, as reported in the Guardian.

There Is A Law, But Where Is The Logic?

Steven Ralston, the director of the maternal fetal medicine division at George Washington University told the Washington Post that "the chances of there being a healthy newborn at the end of this is very, very small." Rightly so, the baby is born in six months of pregnancy, is premature and is currently in NICU.

Newkirk too confirmed about fluid in baby's brain and that the baby maybe blind, or may no be able to walk.

A Controversial Case

Abortion, under Georgia law, is banned after six weeks of pregnancy. Certainly, as this case seems, there is no scope of exception either. The ban also contains provisions that strengthens the concept of "fetal personhood", a doctrine that holds embryos and fetuses should be considered people, and, as such, are entitled to full legal rights and protection.

Smith's case has ignited a national debate concerning medical consent and the far-reaching implications of anti-abortion laws. For years, abortion rights advocates have warned that establishing fetal personhood could create conflicts between the rights of a pregnant individual and those of the fetus. Since Roe v. Wade was overturned in 2022, numerous pregnant individuals have reported being denied medically necessary abortions during emergencies due to these bans.

The hospital currently treating Smith has not commented on her specific case, citing privacy. However, it released a statement indicating its process: "uses consensus from clinical experts, medical literature, and legal guidance to support our providers as they make individualized treatment recommendations in compliance with Georgia’s abortion laws and all other applicable laws."

Conflicting Interpretations of Georgia Law

Georgia Attorney General Chris Carr's office has stated that the state’s six-week abortion law does not mandate medical professionals to keep brain-dead individuals on life support. According to spokesperson Kara Murray, "Removing life support is not an action with the purpose to terminate a pregnancy."

However, not surprisingly, some anti-abortion advocates hold a different view. Georgia State Senator Ed Setzler, who sponsored the state's abortion ban, told the Associated Press, "it is completely appropriate that the hospital do what they can to save the life of the child." He added, "I think this is an unusual circumstance, but I think it highlights the value of innocent human life. I think the hospital is acting appropriately."

Smith, said Newkirk, would be taken off life support on Tuesday.

Are more and more women delaying their motherhood in the United States? Data seems to show this trend. The average age of mothers at childbirth in the United States have continued to rise. A new report released on June 13 by the National Vital Statistic System (NVSS), provides the shift in age trends between 2016 and 2023. The study, conducted by Andrea D. Brown, Ph.D., M.P.H., and her colleagues at the National Center for Health Statistics.

A Shift Towards Later Motherhood

The researchers found a clear increase in the mean age of mothers at the time of their first birth. In 2016, the average age of a first-time mother was 26.6 years. By 2023, this had risen to 27.5 years — nearly a full year’s difference in just seven years.

But the trend isn’t limited to first-time mothers. For women having their second child, the average age rose by one year, while those giving birth to a third child or beyond saw an increase of 0.9 years. These shifts reflect a broader societal trend toward delayed childbearing, often influenced by factors such as education, career planning, financial stability, and access to reproductive health services.

What The Trends Show Across Demographics

Notably, the increase in maternal age was observed across all racial and ethnic groups, with rises ranging from 0.4 to 1.4 years between 2016 and 2023. This indicates that the pattern of delayed childbearing is not confined to one particular group but is a nationwide phenomenon affecting diverse communities.

Urbanization also plays a role. The report shows a consistent rise in maternal age at first birth across all types of counties — from densely populated urban areas to rural regions. Women living in large metropolitan counties had the highest mean age at first birth in 2023, averaging 28.5 years. In contrast, women in noncore (rural) counties had the lowest average at 24.8 years. Nonetheless, even these rural areas experienced an increase in age, with the average rising by 0.7 to 0.9 years depending on the county type.

“The mean age of mothers at childbirth in the United States increased from 2016 through 2023, continuing the long-term trend toward delayed childbearing,” the authors noted. This upward shift builds on similar findings from previous years and highlights a steady cultural change in how and when women choose to have children.

Delaying childbirth can have both benefits and challenges. On one hand, it often correlates with improved financial and emotional readiness, access to healthcare, and better outcomes for children. On the other hand, advanced maternal age can also bring higher risks for complications during pregnancy and childbirth, making ongoing medical monitoring and support essential.

Why Does It Matter?

Understanding maternal age trends helps public health experts, policymakers, and healthcare providers better plan for the needs of pregnant women and infants. It also reflects broader shifts in societal expectations, gender roles, and reproductive choices in the United States today.

As this trend continues, experts are calling for more inclusive policies and better support systems for parents — no matter when they decide to start their families.

Only about one in four mothers in the United States now say they are in “excellent” mental or physical health, according to a new study that reveals a sharp decline in maternal well-being over the past several years. The findings, published in JAMA Internal Medicine on Tuesday, underscore growing concerns around the mental health crisis affecting American families—especially mothers.

A Steep Decline Over Time

The study analyzed health data from 198,417 mothers with children under the age of 18, tracking changes from 2016 to 2023. Researchers found a significant drop in self-reported mental health among mothers during this period, with a smaller but still notable decline in physical health.

Using a four-point scale (excellent, very good, good, and fair/poor), the study revealed that the percentage of mothers reporting “excellent” mental health plummeted from 38.4% in 2016 to just 25.8% in 2023. At the same time, those reporting “good” mental health increased from 18.8% to 26.1%, while “fair/poor” mental health rose from 5.5% to 8.5%.

Physical health scores also declined. The proportion of moms reporting “excellent” physical health dropped from 28.0% to 23.9%. Meanwhile, the percentage describing their physical health as “good” grew from 24.3% to 28.1%, while those in the “fair/poor” category remained relatively stable.

Vulnerable Groups Hit Hardest

The mental health decline was seen across all socioeconomic groups, but it was most pronounced among single mothers, women with lower levels of education, and those whose children are covered by public insurance. These findings echo long-standing concerns about disparities in health access and outcomes among women and underserved populations.

While the study also looked at male parents and noted similar downward trends in physical and mental health, fathers consistently reported better overall health than mothers. In 2023, the gap was particularly stark, with female parents 4 percentage points more likely than male parents to report “fair/poor” mental health.

Parenting Under Pressure

This latest research builds on earlier warnings from public health officials. In 2023, former U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy released an advisory titled "Parents Under Pressure," which called attention to the toll caregiving takes on mental health.

“The work of parenting is essential not only for the health of children but also for the health of society,” Murthy wrote. “The well-being of parents and caregivers is directly linked to the well-being of their children.”

The authors of the JAMA study echoed that sentiment, linking their findings to broader national health trends, including rising rates of depression and anxiety among reproductive-age women.

What’s Behind the Decline?

While the study did not explore specific causes, researchers cited several possible contributors to the ongoing decline in maternal mental health. These include:

• Limited access to mental health services
• Social isolation
• Increased substance use disorders
• Broader societal stressors such as inflation, systemic racism, gun violence, and climate change

The authors also referenced a growing body of research suggesting that maternal health may be an early warning sign of declining public health overall, writing: “Our findings are supportive of the claim made by some scholars that maternal mortality may be a canary in the coal mine for women’s health more broadly.”

As concerns around maternal mental health intensify, the study highlights the urgent need for more targeted policies and accessible support systems to improve the well-being of mothers—and by extension, their children and families.